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Friday, June 2nd, 2006
7:07 pm

jeshala
[18:46] Nikki Chenowith: That is also possible. I hear awesome protects against many things.
[18:47] Kraqf33nd: It doesn't protect against me trying to force spawn into your throat, but rather causes it. Odd!
[18:47] Nikki Chenowith: Extremely so!
[18:47] Nikki Chenowith: Mmm, tasty spawn.
[18:49] Kraqf33nd: aww, if you digest them, how will they burst forth from your abdomen and stream out into the world like the beautiful representations of our love that they are?
[18:49] Nikki Chenowith: Well I'll just have a few then.
[18:49] Kraqf33nd: Oh fine.
[18:49] Nikki Chenowith: The rest can go on to be fertalized IF YOU MUST.
[18:50] Kraqf33nd: Don't worry. They'll be full grown, so there will be no diapers or parent/teacher conferences.
[18:50] Nikki Chenowith: Of course, with my abdomen all shredded, I'm not sure I'd be up to much parenting anyway.
[18:50] Kraqf33nd: Eh, put some bactine and a band-aid on it.
[18:51] Nikki Chenowith: True, that combination DOES cure everything.
[18:51] Kraqf33nd: It does!
[18:52] Nikki Chenowith: These are strong magicks.
[18:52] Kraqf33nd: God save us all should they fall into the wrong hands.
[18:53] Nikki Chenowith: Still though, they most they could do is heal all blights.
[18:53] Kraqf33nd: True.
[18:53] Nikki Chenowith: I don't think it's possibly to harness the power of band-aid for evil
[18:53] Kraqf33nd: Or turn themselves into an unstoppable, undefeatable juggernaut.
[18:53] Nikki Chenowith: Which could be viewed as slightly evil.
[18:53] Nikki Chenowith: Depends on if they gave piggy-back rides.
[18:54] Kraqf33nd: Ooh, evil piggy-back rides?
[18:54] Nikki Chenowith: Evil, BUT FUN.

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Thursday, May 25th, 2006
11:01 pm

jeshala
Global Quest: The global quest has been won by Mirrim.

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Wednesday, May 24th, 2006
10:21 pm

jeshala
(Friend): [sic] Vaun . o O ( Dolt is a thinker )
(Friend): Tir . o O ( vaun is a drinker )
(Friend): [sic] Vaun . o O ( Tir is a genius )
(Friend): Tir . o O ( vaun has no penis )
(Friend): [sic] Vaun . o O ( Tir is a bitch )
(Friend): Tir . o O ( vaun has cock itch )
(Friend): [sic] Vaun . o O ( Tir is going to end up dating a gay man from Nova Scotia )
(Friend): Tir . o O ( Better that than banging fat ol' Mike Scocia )

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6:05 pm

jeshala
Damroll : 251
(Friend) Erra stares at the sky.
(Friend): A FOAMING Dashiell stares at this guy.
ftalk There's a special sort of glee in typing 'put all.dag bag' and seeing a field of 'Dagger of Aardwolf'.
(Friend) Hanaita Psymon: 'better is "put all.dag mobs_ass" '
The brains of Mirrim is DEAD!!
(Friend) A ZOOMING BovineMan: 'Everytime I cast vaccinate I firmly believe I'm helping prevent the spread of AIDS.'
(Friend) sic Toast: 'I dont know the question, but since tela was asking, was the answer cumdumpster?'
(Friend) sic Toast: 'damn eao, I was typing that'
(Friend) sic Toast: 'guess great minds and mediocre minds think alike'
(Friend) A ZOOMING BovineMan: 'Eao, I swear. I wish I knew how to quit you.'
[ [ [ Bells chime across the realm as Mirrim and BovineMan are married! ] ] ]
(Friend): Jurassic Jakalair disappears into a crowd of his loyal servents...the monkey people
(Friend) Ul'Saruk Ishkur: 'I am looking forward to Las Vegas speeding up their marriage process. "Do you take this human to be your spouse?" Type in "accept marriage hooker".'

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Monday, May 22nd, 2006
10:48 pm

jeshala
There is a loud scream and a flare of light shoots towards the sky.
Below the flare, you hear Mirrim scream 'HEAR ME FOR I HAVE CONQUERED!'
As the light fades you realize a new superhero has been born.
For the next 10 minutes experience is doubled in honor of the new superhero.
Congratulations! You are now a superhero!

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Sunday, May 21st, 2006
6:17 pm

jeshala
(-DoH-) sic Vaun: sorry, I had to stop a nun across the street from prostituting herself for an edited copy of The Davinci Code
(-DoH-) sic Vaun: what did I miss
(-DoH-) sic Vaun: if given a chice bewteeen fucking a guy and being a douche, I would choose being a douche
21 May 00:40 - No one wuv Torazin tells you 'I think you should make it a clan rule that we need to have our penis length in our title.'
21 May 00:41 - No one wuv Torazin tells you 'I'll be "We all wuv Torasin: Can't measure with Tir's mom in the way"'
(Friend) Bed Bug Xandros: 'can you get on an incline or a ladder or something? the stick up MY ass prevents me from bending at the waist'
(Friend) Tir: 'KEKEKE I AM A BUILDER I AM SO CLEVER I WILL MAKE MY MOBS IMMUNE TO EVERYTHING KE KE'
(Friend) No one wuv Torazin: 'Tir: Don't forget making all the rooms PK and norecall'
(Friend) I<3Delight Tela: '2) Edible Ba'als is carried by Shaquille O'Neal'
(Group) A ZOOMING BovineMan: 'quest: Frightened Paul (Dune: The Desert Planet) time: 02:51

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Saturday, May 20th, 2006
11:30 pm

jeshala
_-/Rogues\-_ The Drake Forestseer: You are shocked by a redneck exposing himself to you. 3 Dashiell's shock -=--:-*-:-*--* METEORITES *--*-:-*-:--=- you! 501
Sebastion (Mormaer) tells the CLAN: 'its the tirets in me coming out sometimes i walk up to people in walmart and go.....DILL PICKLE SMELLING BALL SWEAT in my best down syndrome voice'
(Friend) A FOAMING Dashiell: 'I take the 'the' out of psychotherapist.'
(Friend) Narf! Xantcha: 'Wow... gotta love being spammed with ASCII dick tells by troublemaker newbies :P'

20 May 16:41 - Narf! Xantcha tells you '())=======D'
Tir's Monkey Bone glows momentarily but nothing happens.
20 May 23:54 - sic Jilted tells you 'Every time you eat a steak, a hippy loses his hacky-sack'
--Daoine-',{Tir: >(o.O)< . o O ( someone's calling me, Alfred. )
sic Jilted: my butthole is pretty surly
sic Jilted: this mud gives a whole new meaning for TP FOR MY BUNGHOLE
--Daoine-',{Tir: I'm glad that the decision between sleep and gclan has once again tilted toward gclan.

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10:36 pm

jeshala
[20 May 23:35:26] (WanGrp?!) (204, Cruel) Tela: You are sitting in your manor idling. You notice Tela in Immortal Homes, and all of a sudden she strangles you. As usual, I don't mind abusing players, even newbies and remorts.
[20 May 23:35:27] (WanGrp?!) (158, Satanic) Tir: Looking out the window, you see a rustling in the bushes. Is it a cat? Just the wind? No, it's only me. I don't want to group...I just like to watch.

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10:59 am

jeshala
(Friend) sic Vaun: 'the next two words are brought to you by old ladies and weirdos'
(Friend) sic Vaun: 'JEHOVAHS WITNESSES'

.:|Wolf|:. Buffy Tela: Or be a real pk'er and make it to 204!
DarkTears (Ellyllon) tells the CLAN: 'I spurt to the finish 'cause I eats me biznitch'
DarkTears (Ellyllon) tells the CLAN: 'I am popeye the wanker man!'

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Friday, May 19th, 2006
10:49 pm

jeshala
(Friend) Buffy Tela: 'I'm ambidextrous, which as we all know, means that I have both a hoo-ha and a chacha.'
(Friend) Mt. Craigath: 'After I die and go to hetero hell'
(Friend) C:\borrow\ Ashkelon: 'you can tongue my balls and call me skippy :/'
(Friend) CuddlyBear Suz: 'magic the gathering'
(Friend) CuddlyBear Suz: 'or nerd poker as tela calls it'
(Friend) sic Vaun: 'I wanna see wasabi and spicyhot duel'
(Friend) *censored*: 'Sort of like accidentally saying: "TIME TO SUCK MY DICK NIGGANIGGA UHHHH" by accident when you actually MEANT to say, "Beg pardon Clarence, but could you fetch me another fig?"'

.oOo.*Romani*.oOo. Cardiac Arist: moist and supple
(Group) Eao Eao Eao: 'cock pouch'

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12:27 am

jeshala
.--Daoine-',{@ Tir: "Non-gay cat people are cat people 'cuz they can't afford a leopard or a panther or a tiger or a lion."
Tir (Tighearn) tells the CLAN: 'It would take you all 20 mins to SW around my monstrous man meat'
(Friend) Shortbus Vega: 'gclan In the 1930's a demon of poverty and despair swept over the American nation as entire generations found themselves unemployed and unable to find work. You are not able to access the gclan channel.'
(Friend) sic Jilted: 'I've read the whole internet'
(Friend) sic Toast: 'brb kicking puppies and pushing over old people'
(Friend) sic Vaun: 'civil rights are not guaranteed for cows under the aardwolf constitution'
(Friend) sic Vaun: 'the greatest movie of all time will the the movie they make about my career on aard...called Vauns on A MUD'
(Friend) Naelia: 'WHY NOT JUST MAKE A SHOW ABOUT A TALKING FUCKING DOUCHE TOWELETTE '
(Friend) sic Jilted: 'It's Tampy and wipe!'
A ZOOMING BovineMan moos plaintively as he attacks a cow!
(Friend) *Angelic* Naer: 'www.asciiartfornonjewishpeople.com'

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Thursday, May 18th, 2006
10:59 am

jeshala
(Friend) Bed Bug Xandros: 'heh ike, i had someone on flist who said theyd never been pked.... so one day i offered them a spellup when they were in range, they followed me and i immediately ran the desert doom sw and backstab killed them they didn't see the humor i did...'
(Friend) sic Jilted: 'Shakia tells you 'GUESS WHAT IM LISTENING TO' You tell Shakia 'dashboard confessional' Shakia tells you 'you are a stupid asshole''
(Friend) sic Jilted: 'Malak, if I wanted any of your lip, I'd eat your pussy!'
(Friend) 007.5 Xyzzy: 'nickel, dime and bongload are metric measures?'
(Friend): Buffy Tela reaches around A FOOMING Mirrim's backside and sticks a cock up her ass tenderly.
(Friend) Buffy Tela: 'sedit new mirrimsass'
(Friend) The Ultimate: 'my cock in your mouth is a pretty good song'
(Friend) sic Jilted: 'You still have to kill * My cock (Balls deep in your ass)'
(Friend) sic Vaun: 'if Plato were alive today, hed have a half ass talk show on the WB'
18 May 11:41 - We all wuv Torasin tells you 'Poop spelled backwards is poop.'

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Tuesday, May 16th, 2006
9:55 pm

jeshala
(Friend) PigSqueal Tela: 'I don't talk to my food before I eat it. Why would I talk to my victims before I kill them? :)'
DUEL: Smokealot ( T0,R1,L1 / 98 ) has challenged Slith ( T9,R7,L201 / 1950 )
You say 'What else eats aardies.'
Tir says 'FF XI.'
Una asks 'cervical cancer?'
(Friend) Bed Bug Xandros: 'ftalk -h the truth "(Friend) Roebart: 'my name is jilted and i like it in the butt'"'
(Friend) sic Vaun: 'You tell OMG! It's Jehanine 'hey, this isn't a WoW server''
(Friend): Ty's Ångel Liset purposefully lathers up her massive cock and forcefully sticks in Mirrim's butt.

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8:56 pm

jeshala
(Friend) Celestial Nightstar: 'Tricksy studentses. Hates them, precious, yesss, we hates them. Studentses, grubbing for gradeses, grubbing and ssscraping and ssneaking, and their heads sso empty-- ssssso empty, gollum, gollum. No brains. No scrumptiously crunchable brainses, no precious, jusst air and dussst. Dussst! '
(Friend) Celestial Nightstar: 'Hates them. Ssstupid sstudentses, don't even read the textbook, no preciouss. They writes, and writes, and sscrawls and scribbles-- our eyes, precious, we must ruin our poor eyeses on their scratchings-- but they don't think, do they, precious? They never thinksss. Gollum. No, no thinking for them, sstupid studentses. Too good for thinking, gollum But we'll show them, preciouss, yess. '
(Friend) Celestial Nightstar: 'Fail them. Fail them, precious. We can bleed bright red ink all over their nassssty homeworks, yesss, precious. We can fail the studentses. Make them cry. Make them weep and wail and sssob. Yesss.'

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7:36 pm

jeshala
(Friend) [sic] Jilted: 'I'm playing your mom in another window'

(Friend) [sic] Toast: 'dude I love that game'

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7:36 pm

jeshala
(Friend) Toast: 'iTunes v6, for the hearing impaired'
16 May 20:32:07 - (Friend) Toast: 'its like playboy for the blind'
16 May 20:32:17 - (Friend) Vega: 'But yes, Tyanon, that is where I am trying to go.'
16 May 20:32:34 - (Friend) Jilted: 'lol playboy in braille'
16 May 20:32:36 - (Friend) Tyanon: 'really?'
16 May 20:33:00 - (Friend) Vaun: 'you wouldnt know until the last dot that it was gay porn'
16 May 20:33:12 - (Friend) Vaun: 'then youd be all "omg"'
16 May 20:33:16 - (Friend) Jilted: 'lol wtf...this feels like a AH FUCK'

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Monday, May 15th, 2006
3:32 pm

jeshala
(Friend) Obyron: 'Good Idea: Pupping at Superhero. Bad Idea: Getting your puppy to pup you at Superhero.'
Rapturous Sunsoar tells you 'FOOM. FOOM! FOOOOOOOOOOOM... *ZIM*'
CLANINFO: Mirrim has been appointed a leader of clan The Daoine Sidhe
(Friend) sic Jilted: 'MY MUMPS! MY MUMPS MY MUMPS MY MUMPS! My nasty disease filled lumps!'
(Curse) Zasz: lol rankings in baal clan sound like names from Wheel Of Time
[Ba'al] Quadrapus: Whats the wheel of time?
BovineMan (Teglach) tells the CLAN: 'SLAP THAT GUAT HO DO A RAIL OF COKE DRINK HENNESEY EHEHE YEEEAAH UHH UHH, that's rap.'
Becoming Wayne tells you 'You could still say "Aga ma lõpetan mõttetu jutu nüüd ära ja püüan rohkem omaette olla", though'
(Friend) Alida: 'oily anal leakage and cottage cheese-like discharge'
(Friend) Alida: 'i had a dream that a volcano erupted through a costco and then i fooled around with the president...except it was one of the hot presidents in the movies ....i dunno what the hell is up with my dreams'
(Friend) PigSqueal Tela: 'I like my men tight. It's hot when my strap-on tears through their rectal cherry.'

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Thursday, May 11th, 2006
2:47 pm

jeshala
(Friend) :D Dolt: 'i'll foom you in the doinker'
(Friend) :D Dolt: 'or poop you in the foomer'
(Friend) :D Dolt: 'can i poop your foomer mirrim'
(Friend) sic Vaun: 'everytime I activate my NBigerian bot, it kills of 13000 of its own kind, demands aid money from the UN and then uses that to buy up a stash of AK47s'
(Friend) Buffy Tela: 'I have SEX JOOSE IN MY MOUF'
(Friend) sic Jilted: 'I saw this wino, he was eating grapes. I said, "Dude, you have to wait!"'
(Friend) sic Vaun: 'im trying to draw a picture of myself masturbating, but thats hard to do with one hand'
(Friend) :D Dolt: 'I used to smoke pot, like.. the other day'
(Friend) sic Vaun: 'I had to quit smoking pot because i was A getting paranoid and B....hey, quit looking at me like that asshole'
(Friend) Herald Talia: 'labia is a troubled country oft associated with terrorism.'
(Friend) Naelia: 'it's fun to have a DICK in your EYE'
Ba'al «RuNaWaY» Isildur: someone nochan wolf, they are spamming gclan :P

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Tuesday, May 9th, 2006
10:32 pm

jeshala
(Friend) :D Dolt: 'i'll foom you in the doinker'
(Friend) :D Dolt: 'or poop you in the foomer'
(Friend) :D Dolt: 'can i poop your foomer mirrim'
(Friend) sic Vaun: 'everytime I activate my NBigerian bot, it kills of 13000 of its own kind, demands aid money from the UN and then uses that to buy up a stash of AK47s'
(Friend) Buffy Tela: 'I have SEX JOOSE IN MY MOUF'
(Friend) sic Jilted: 'I saw this wino, he was eating grapes. I said, "Dude, you have to wait!"'
(Friend) sic Vaun: 'im trying to draw a picture of myself masturbating, but thats hard to do with one hand'

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Wednesday, May 3rd, 2006
3:56 pm

jeshala
(Friend) Extemporis Agilis: '... why is there a bazillion posts about illegal aliens... and why aren't the MiB doing something about it'
(Friend) Voidwalker: 'About 10 jokes about brokeback cookie baking asspegging gay dutch people per minute on ftalk :p'
(Friend) Jilted: 'it's a good thing that fish can't talk, because the ocean would be loud as shit'
(Friend) Jilted: 'Submerge your head and all you would hear is "Aah, Fuck! I thought I looked like that rock!"'
Queen Mab tells you 'Seek Giant Kraken out somewhere in the vicinity'
Giant Kraken is surrounded by a pink outline.
Torasin (Tighearn) tells the CLAN: 'A quester in Daoine? She's a witch!'
Torasin (Tighearn) tells the CLAN: 'Tori's mooom, you're the one. You make bed time lots of fun. Tori's mom I'm awfully fond of you, ooh, umphie umphie umph.'
(Friend) We all wuv Torasin: 'It's proof that God hates us, really. Sick babies, puppies being run over, and Chestwick not having been flattened by a falling piano.'
(Friend) Chew Toy Tori: 'Torasin is supermanly, YY chromosomes, baby!'

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